Do You Hoochie Coochie?

This article by Tommey Wee from last week's issue of 8 Days really cracked me up. I LOL in the mrt, inviting many curious stares and unuttered thoughts on whether the said person was insane.

I'm gonna share this hilarious piece with all of you so that you all can LOL too. Just make sure you don't read this during office hours. ;P

Now it's an article about Hoochie Coochie -- A new facial aiming to exfoliate and smooth a woman's nether region.

It opened with a huge but rather unflattering picture of Kurara Chibana, whipping her drapes apart to reveal her tie dye bikini top and OoOH a huge smiley face across her crotch.

Now I can't find a similar picture on the internet but believe me, the photo is indeed unflattering.

Firstly, the 8 Days photo of Kurara does not even resemble Kurara.

Secondly, the same Kurara has practically boobs as flat as her washboard tummy. Now how can that be possible? We all know how well-endowed Kurara is.

Let me splash a couple of droolicious photos of Kurara before I regurgitate the article here.



This fine woman is Miss Japan Universe 2006, Kurara Chibana. That's striking pose right there. You can almost imagine her squealing, "Tadah!" It's an awesome photo because she looks super confident and poised, like she got all her waxing done in time.

Incidentally, there’s a lot of talk about a new facial available at Strip in town. It’s called the Hoochie Coochie facial. It sounds like a terrible dance, but technically speaking, it’s a facial that costs up to $95. It’s just not for the face. Confused?

It’s for that sensitive area between a woman’s legs. That’s right, after brutal stripping and waxing, auntie therapists strong enough to arm-wrestle your dad will casually caution, “Would you like a Hoochie Coochie? You don’t want chicken skin there, do you?” Now for the sake of readers who don’t pluck, shave or wax (where are your friends?), “chicken skin” refers to the raised, uneven pores, the kind you get when you repeatedly attack yourself with tweezers.

The Hoochie Coochie Facial claims to cool your skin from the hot wax while reducing blemishes and uneven tones. I’m just wondering, how much time do people spend down there? It’s not something you show someone over coffee, do you? “See Rachel, look what I got today… The Hoochie! Go ahead, touch it… touch it! Smooth hor?”

I looked up “hoochie coochie” in Urbandictionary.com and found two definitions: 1) “Slutty women who can never seem to find their own man to f****.” 2) “A shameless hussy who always pushes up on a guy even though he has a girlfriend.” There was even a helpful example of how to use the term in a sentence:”Damn, man, it seems that everytime I find a man, some hoochie coochie always tries to f**** with him.”

So it’s a noun then.

I think it’s very unfair labeling for women who opt for the Hoochie Coochie. It suggest some form of preparation for sin. You don’t get facials unless you are making an appearance right? Same theory. Also – and I’m more concerned about this – does it mean that all moral women keep a Sasquatch in their pants?

I think women really have the whole 'hair' thing down. They're as smooth as eggs now. In terms of hair removal technology, women make us guys look like medieval butchers hacking away at bloody beef. They've got strips, waxes, creams, electrolysis and now, facials. They're done with hair. It's extinct now. I can't even deal with plucking my eyebrows. The last time a girl tweezed hair off my chin, I gripped the sheets and teared silently.

But I'm concerned with how easily women are coerced into getting facials there. Do they really need it, though? If someone's face is inches from my groin and she's holding hot wax or sharp objects, I'd do anything she suggests, It's called "vulnerability". Who's gonna negotiate? Who's gonna sit there, parted like elevator doors, and defend her chicken skin?

And what will happen if the Hoochie Coochie facial takes off? I picture new products swarming the market, stuff like pitera jelly masks, whiteners, peels, scrubs and pimple creams, all for the female genitalia. And over coffee, you'll overhear conversations that go, "She had a nice therapist who massaged her for extra 15 minutes, okay. She's just great. I'm telling you, I want my face to be as smooth as Susan's *vajayjay."



*Creator of Grey's Anatomy, Rhimes, told us that she was obliged to create the word "vajayjay" for "vagina" in scripts because of endless hassle with the [Standards & Practices] department. "They told me we couldn't say 'vagina' one more time in our show." Now, of course the word "vajayjay" has entered the popular lexicon among female fans of the show.

You have five sense organs. If you had to lose one of your sense organs, which would you prefer to lose? Why?

That was a discussion question posted at the end of this week's P3 Science notes.

And my most classic answer:

I prefer to lose my ears. I do not have to listen to teacher while she was [sic] teaching.

Gone in a flash

I've been patiently waiting for the return of my 2nd sis's hardisk since she reformatted her PC on Saturday. Using whatever time I had whenever she was not at home, I happily edited all my Team Building photos, even trying my hands at Photoshop. Have been editing the hundreds of them from eveybody's camera for the past week and had wanted to complete everything on my Wednesday off day.

And then tonight I was told that her hardisk is spoilt. SPOILT!

My 1st sis was trying all means to get her hardisk running till 3am, knowing in her heart from the sound the hardisk made that it was spoilt, yet trying very hard to give my 2nd sis a glimmer of hope by trying all means and way to get it to start.

But spoilt means spoilt. Gone means gone.

On top of that, I was not even able to retrieve all the more recent photos as I've just lent my camera to my colleague for work purpose and told her to feel free to delete all the photos inside as I've uploaded them.

While I'm upset that all my stuff from August 2006 is gone, I cannot show my anguish because what my 2nd sis lost was A LOT more. All the work she has done, her showreel and films.

I feel so irritated that I cannot vent my frustration outwardly. I think that I'm very selfish and making a nuisance of myself. I try to console myself that I didn't lose a lot as the bulk of my stuff were the photos and they were MERELY photos. Yet on the other hand, photos mean a lot to me!

Maybe I should blame myself for not taking precaution and backing up my files. Maybe I should blame myself for not insisting that I transfer all my files onto my laptop before she reformatted. But I don't feel any better.

I JUST WANNA LET OFF SOME STEAM AND SSSSSCCCCCRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMM!

It's raining Sonys

It has been 6 months since the unfortunate demise of my pink panasonic lumix. Up till this present moment, I'm still cursing the thief endlessly; wishing and hoping and praying that his or her asshole be infested with a million fleas.

I'm quite surprised that I can manage to survive quite well on my old fuji. The digital camera market saw an influx of models since last November when I was researching that I could hardly keep track of how many canon ixus-es, lumix fx-es, olympus mju-s and sony-s have since hit our shores. I simply cannot understand why these companies come up with so many different models within a mere period of 6 months. I'm so tired of researching that I decided that I should just stick to lumix.

Then, this pretty little thing appeared...



Sony claims it is an improvement of its T10 series.

In terms of physical beauty, this pink T20 has metallic body casing which is just so chio, unlike the plasticky-Barbie-toy-looking pink T10.

Tested the T20 at the Sony Gallery. All the glitches in T10 were fortunately absent in this model. While T10 captured pictures totally untrue to their natural colours with unflattering blueish and greenish tinge, the T20 snapped warm coloured pictures almost true to what you see. T20 had the ability to capture shots with adequate brightness without flash too, which was a major concern for me. However, the lighting at the Sony Gallery may have lent a hand.

So far T20 has been performing quite well.

It's raining Sonys in my heart now...



evan would recommend her lumix fx01 which enabled her to capture great shots of grand pyramids and massive blocks of stones unachievable by any other point and shoot till the ixus dunno number what came up.

"The photos turn out quite dim though. But give and take..."

DIM!

Why can't we have a take and take camera? Why must we compromise on some functions?

My favourite Naoko Iijima is also recommending the lumix.



Now, what should I do?

Prattling, Rattling

Co Team Building 17th, 18th April

More to be updated. Loads of photos from everyone's camera to come soon. I wonder how long I'll take to blog about this event.

Meanwhile these are 2 photos I really like a lot...

The same room kakis bullying "skater boy"



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Click click click

No new updates for now. However, I've finally gotten the photos taken on new year's eve. Ripped them off kh's bro's blog. If you find that you have just wasted your click on my blog with no new updates, check out the entry dated 10th January 2007. It's somewhere right at the bottom of this page. =)

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I want my laptop

I long to have my own lap top, surf the net during my own free time without to wait for my sis to be out, download whatever I want without getting scolded and blog at my own pace.

I can't wait to use my temporary compaq laptop from kh. It's supposed to be for his bro who isn't in sg right now so I'm gonna use it 1st till he comes home and hopefully I would have personalised it so much that he would not wanna get it back from me. *MuaHaHaHa*

Kh is such a darling to cheat that laptop for me. He's also such a darling to help me transfer my few hundred contacts from hp to sim to hp. Now, if anyone contacts me on my mainline, I don't have to apologise for asking who the person is. However, my sms line is devoid of contacts. The lazy ass me will add all your contacts soon. =P

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♥New love♥

Remember I mentioned that I wasn't too happy with the quality of my Abercrombie Casey Fur Bomber Jacket?



The nice seller informed me that she could not do an exchange as that was the last piece but could at most refund me 10 buckeroos. Instead, I surfed her site again and decided to top up $10 in exchange for this...


I'm so loving my Nadia Fur now!!!

And I really miss shopping! Like you know, tangible one? Not e-shopping. I haven't been to town for weeks. May kh's exams end soo so we can go gaigai.

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Fannatic over Fann's Crowning Glory

Not too long ago, a random reader asked me about one of my outfits saying it resembles what Fann Wong wore in Beautiful Illusions <<镜中人>>.



The bimbo in me was elated coz that was exactly the outfit which had caught my eye in the show and I had never expected anyone to link my outfit to what she wore.

I really really liked Fann Wong's style in <<镜中人>> as the "evil twin". Her dressing, her hairstyle, her lined eyes. I remember searching all over the net for pictures of her in the show but it was like searching for a needle in a haystack. I forgot the title of the show and googling "Fann Wong" under image search would warrant millions of pictures of her.

Thanx to you eternal! Now I have photos of her chio chio style. Taken from Mediacorp

After getting so used to my no longer curled yet utterly unstraight hair, looking at these pictures make me wanna rebond my hair and cut bangs. Should I?

Nice hair!

Now if only I have a face like that to boot.