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Saturday, February 26, 2005

BZ BZ BZ... ...

Been very bz the past week...

Nua-ing in front of the computer, chatting with good pal Bei and watching The Simple Life II is like the most heavenly thing I've done this week.

You can tell alot about a girl who feels doing such stuff is heaven.

She simply have no life... not even to mention a simple one.

But wait... Kh is back... I ought to have some life...

But I don't.

Work hasn't been too kind... tuition kids are all having CA1... I have to plan my timetable carefully.

I wish I could clone me.

I'm so nua..........

Maybe I shouldn't clone me. I should genetically modify me coz my cells are all weak and dying and nua.

Am I even making sense?

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

On my previous entry…

I typed everything in a whirl. Whatever came into my mind, I typed it word for word. Sweet memories… happy times… stirred feelings and most importantly, honest thoughts.

When I felt that there was nothing more to type, I stared at the page, read through and wondered if I should post it up. It’s not like me to type such stuff publicly.

In the end I posted it up, wishing and hoping that nobody would laugh at me or be so totally grossed out.

I don’t know why I did that.

I felt foolish…

But this foolish boy actually replied to my foolish post.

And then I didn’t feel that foolish anymore.

I was glad I did that.

But I won’t do such embarrassing stuff anymore. I shall revert to my old self as from now.


Ok promise kept.

I went to see my doctor last night to stop my parents and friends from nagging at and scolding me.

My doc seemed delighted to see me. She said she hasn’t seen me for a very long time.

Look at what little treats I got from the trip to the doctor's.
DRUGS! Posted by Hello

I think they look more like some kinda dodgy drugs like this. $40 leh!!! It’s like club drugs lor. Posted by Hello

Julie suggested washing them down with Coke. She professed some grand theory that long ago Coke was used as a cough mixture. I think she thinks she is talking to a geena. But she sounded so convincing. Btw, I met up with good pals Julie and Tammy for lunch this afternoon. It was kinda impromptu. Tam was so in a rush that she kept glancing at her watch throughout the whole meal. Next time, the NUS boys should join us at TP for lunch on Wednesdays. It’s not too difficult right? I can bring some bak kwa if it will lure teoks out.

Monday, February 14, 2005

Happy Valentine’s Day

 Posted by Hello

14th February happens to be my anniversary with kh. Happy 4th anniversary to you deardear! *muax* That should make up for me not getting you anything… again.

Valentine’s Day used to be a really special day back then when we were still schooling.

It was a big thing in St Nicks. I suppose it is like that in every girls school. Friends go round screaming with joy and giving big bear hugz. Cute little gifts and notes, hand-made cards, chocolates, soft toys, roses and tulips… The thrill of receiving single stalk of flowers from other school boys on your way home.

I recall being single then and how Zann and I were contemplating selling roses on V-days to earn some petty cash.

Those childlike thoughts….

It was quite a big thing in JC too. V-day at NYJC was fun. V-day at RJ was fun too. Not such a big thing as how girls school celebrate the occasion, but still, it was fun.

Then in NUS, it was nothing at all. Kh is forever overseas and I spent a few V-days with Evan when she was bf-less. She kept up with the girls school tradition… Presenting me with small little gifts and hand written notes. Came across them during spring cleaning that day. *Big bear hugz to you* She is one friend who will always stand by me. This reminds me… I’ve yet to sms you… Shall do so now.

It makes me feel so old now…. How I miss those school days… those warm and fuzzy feelings from friends.

“How does it feel that your bf is forever overseas?”

Many people asked me that question.

For the past few years, V-day was spent at home. It is one occasion which is too commercialized. Nothing special. Then kh would call and we would chat… Very simple but good.

I’m contented with that.

Gifts were one-sided. And you could guess who is at the receiving end.

Like every Valentine’s Day, today feels just like any normal Monday.

Before you get the wrong impression… I’m not complaining that you are perpetually overseas.

My most memorable V-day was the one in 2001, when we got together. I remembered how you planned everything so nicely and how some things backfired. I remember how tense it was for you to pop that question only at the end of the date while I was happily poking fun at you throughout the day.

I remember how silly you were. But it was that silliness that makes you you.

I remember how silly we both were in sec school too. We were always keeping in touch through the phone, often chatting for hours without knowing that we liked each other.

You were the one who made me me.

Without you, I don’t think I would have the confidence to study and do well in my O levels. Whoever heard of a St nicks gal who gets 30+ points for L1R5 every exam?

Without you, I would not have done well enough to get into RJ after 1st 3 months. RJ life was very memorable and I made really great friends there.

You toned me down a lot.

You also taught me how to value certain things in life. I was a rebellious and self centered gal back then. I was against many people, especially my mother.

I know I’m not a good gf at times.

I don’t shower you with gifts.

I’m always asking you to help me financially.

I shoo you off the phone sometimes when I’m busy when you were thoughtful enough to call.

I tell you things like I‘m happy that you are overseas so I can drown myself with work and tuition without having to entertain you.

I’m very unreasonable to you every now and then. But I’m only unreasonable to you and my family, the ones closest to me.

I nearly made you cry once. I've never seen you cry before.

Suddenly I’m at a loss for words. I don’t know how to express myself.

All I wanna say is…

You helped me a lot in my life… You brought much happiness to my life and I’m really thankful for it. Do you know that you are one of the best things that happened to me?

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Episodes from CNY

This would be a very long entry. Photo blogging and random thoughts here and there.

On the eve of CNY… …

Some primary school mates (Andy, Kairong, Jiaqing and Jianfang) decided to visit Chongfu. The last time I stepped into the school compound was when I was in Secondary 1, which was 10 years ago. The whole school literally had an extreme makeover.

The school has an extension. The old building used to end off slightly after that ugly red stair tower. Posted by Hello

Our nameless little humble hall is now known as the great Tan Kah Kee Hall. Posted by Hello

Cultivating coffee and cafe culture... Would you believe this is the canteen? What happened to those long rows of tables and benches where we used to have huge class meals together? Posted by Hello

Andy said this game was invented by some teachers and actually won some awards somewhere but he doesn't know how to play it. *scratches head* Posted by Hello

Our Eco Garden is pretty neat now but still pretty much plantless and flowerless save for pretty weeds and this pretty purple water lily. Posted by Hello

There are cute signs all over the school…
Cute toilet sign. Posted by Hello

Core values: Mei3 (aesthetics), qun2 (social), ti3 (physical), zhi4 (intellectual), de2 (moral). Jianfang said "So superficial.... rank mei3 as the highest and de2 as the lowest." Posted by Hello

Even the dental nurse had an extreme makeover. It was an entirely new lady. Fifi Ong back in the past was a nightmare to us innocent kids. Being sent to the dentist is like being sent to the black hole. Fifi Ong looks like a witch and would always scream at us back then. The current nurse looked soooo friendly as she assured us that “Dentists are like friends.”

Extreme makeover aside, I was soooo late by the time I reached Chongfu that all the teachers were just about to leave. My pri 6 form teacher remembers my face but was trying so hard to remember my name that I decided not to embarrass her and myself and told her my name after like 3 seconds. She still looks the same and her Mandarin has improved tremendously. I think she is better than me at those strings of Mandarin 4 word phrases… those you utter every new year. My favourite teacher who was my form teacher from pri 1-3 remembers my name! Was very touched. And she still look as young as ever. I did not manage to talk to them for long as all of them were rushing home. Then I saw the teacher which… I mean who almost everyone of us has a personal grudge against. She kept looking towards our direction but none of us went to greet her.

We wanted to explore the school compound more but the school attendant was shooing us away like how zebras’ tails shoo flies away. She shouted in Mandarin that all the teachers have gone home and we should not be here. That aunty has an attitude problem I tell you. She closed and locked the side gate right in front of us.

So our meeting was cut short. But it was good nonetheless. We casually arranged for another meet up one of the days , probably a mahjong session. I don’t really know how to play, but casually agreed to meet up if there should be any one coming up.

Then I went to do some last minute shopping with Jianfang. She is a GRRRREEEAT shopping buddy. Always candid and making jokes outta every single thing. We have pretty much similar taste in certain things and similar complaints about clothes which makes shopping more enjoyable. The last time we really met up, just the 2 of us was in JC. Can’t imagine how we used to be best friends from pri 1-3 and then we just suddenly become as apart as 2 strangers (mind my lousy simile) after that. But each time we met up, we would never fail to have topics to discuss (read: nonsense to share).

“maybe jo..u wanna consider being an air stewardess....together....then we will eat cup noodles....n then we will save up too....then u can ve happy chopper sword of honour...”

One word... “haha”.

Some friends… you can just talk so easily with them no matter how long apart you have been before that.

Of course we took crazy photos too. What else can we do when we throw 2 crazy gals together? Ok, the one behind the cam was my 2nd sis. She met up with us halfway and she has really shaky hands.

She got this clearest one after like 472393 tries.  Posted by Hello

Then she tried unsuccessfully to do a face off image without our knowledge. Posted by Hello

Got this exquisite chinese box at a steal. I don't know what to put in it but heck it's so chio. My 2 sisters think otherwise.  Posted by Hello

We got home at close to 6pm. This is the 1st CNY that I did not help out in the spring cleaning and reunion dinner preparations. As I had the excuse of being sick, I got away with merely cleaning up my room. I didn’t help in my mum’s delicious ngor hiang as well. I stayed out in order not to listen to naggings and quarrels but this year surprisingly, there was nothing of that sort and I was thankful for that.

My mum makes the best ngor hiang in the world. It has a unique taste, not like those wu xiang outside which taste of flour. Every year, dad's side would just wait for us (read: ngor hiang) to arrive before everyone decides to tuck in. Posted by Hello

It was crowded at Grandma’s house this year somehow. I don’t understand. Maybe coz we have a BIG addition to the house.
Presenting.............. Golden! She is my xiao shu shu's (small uncle's) gf's golden retriever. Posted by Hello

Everyone wants a piece of Golden.

Small uncle and Golden... Posted by Hello

Siying and Golden. Posted by Hello

5th uncle (5th aunt's hubby) and Golden. Posted by Hello

2nd sis and Golden... Posted by Hello

Me and Golden...  Posted by Hello

It was soooooooooo difficult to get a good or even decent shot of Golden as she is always moving around, resulting in countless blurred pictures of her. And then when camera batteries went flat, everyone whipped out their handphones. Small uncle decided to collect a photo fee from each of us seeing what good business Golden could bring about. Everyone ignored him and continued snapping.

Of course I also took pictures of and with human and other un-dog objects.

Me and cuz, Nadine. Posted by Hello

Me and my red wine. Posted by Hello

Weihong and Siying. I like them alot!!! So cute and smart. After one year, they really could talk alot!! But they speak Mandarin... I'm incompetent in that language.  Posted by Hello

6th uncle's family. Posted by Hello

Small uncle and his gf. Nobody believes he is like 40+. Nan2 ren2 si4 shi2 still quite fit. Posted by Hello

Read some of the nights happening at my cuz’s blog too.

Aside from the crowd, this year seems different from every other year.

There wasn’t any Jackie Chan shows. Thank goodness.

Almost every year, I would be one of the earliest at the table. People sitting around me ate and left and new people came and sat and ate but I would still be gorging myself with steamboat food. Being sick is no good. That night I didn’t eat like my usual self. I ate only 1 bowl of rice and drank 3 glasses of red wine. My parents could not stop me as they agreed that red wine is good for health.

I also started giving Ah Ma money since I’m working. Mum advised not to put the money in red packet so I folded the $50 bills into hearts. Now it suddenly dawn on me that Ah Ma’s vision and hearing is deteriorating that I wonder if she knew those were dollar notes.

All the cousins have grown up. It makes me feel really really old. I did not talk to the older cousins and the same age one like I usually do. I realized it only like a minute ago. Instead I was talking so much to Siying and Weihong. Probably coz they used to be very shy in the past. Or maybe coz I’m too used to be around kids in my job that I don’t really know how to hold proper conversation with people my age.

Everything just feels very different this year.

Some shots of Simba the Fat...

Happily sun tanning and zzzz on my table. Posted by Hello

Looking up…
 Posted by Hello

2nd sis carrying her like a baby. She hates being carried like that. Posted by Hello

Zzzz again.... using the step as a pillow. Nobody went to that toilet that day as we can't bear to wake her up. Posted by Hello

Bye bye to Baba's old collar. She has been wearing that since she was a kitten. The pink bell has been scratched gold. The collar was furring and dirty. Posted by Hello


(Mum’s side on 2nd day of CNY)….

Best cousins since young... Lydia and me.  Posted by Hello

Cuz Pauline and me. Another nice cousin. We got closer in JC as we were classmates then. Posted by Hello

Da jie was fiddling with my cam when she saw her dream lime green VW car and had to snap it. Posted by Hello

(Back at home)
Da jie and me... We wanted to take a photo of our whole outfit, including our pretty boots and shoes. How bimbotic. If 2nd sis was here, she would be sighing and walking away. That twit went to Malaysia to visit her friend’s durian plantation. Posted by Hello

Pretty shoes...  Posted by Hello

Gambling runs in the female genes in my family… EXCEPT ME! I don’t gamble. I don’t… really! Nobody believes me. Nobody believes I dunno how to play mj. Nobody believes I don’t like going casinos. People’s impression of me would be whole life betting on soccer… which I only did for a period of time… What? Do I look like a du3 gui3 to you all?!

Sorry… emotions got the better of me.

Aside from watching vcd, recovering from sick and sleeping, we played mahjong. As causally as we pri sch mates arranged to meet up for mahjong one of these days, I casually mentioned to my mum that I may be going some friend’s house to play.

“How can you go your friend’s house to play when you don’t even know how to play??? Come kai2 zuo1…. I teach you how.” Mum was so eager to teach me.

Sis also bugged me to learn.

We gave our mj table away since we moved. So we transformed the oval shaped dining table into an mj table.
 Posted by Hello

Mum is such a tyrant. The way she teaches me…

“Hurry up la… so slow… how you play with all the old aunties next time?”
[Uh… but I don’t wanna play with old aunties.]

“Why you keep asking what feng1 is it? Hurry up la.”

“Why do you keep asking what feng you are every round?”

[But I need to know what feng it is to know if I should keep that direction card mah.]

“All of you huh… take so long to throw one card. Just throw la.”
[… …]

“Why you peng4 this one?”
[Huh? Why cannot?]

Upon asking her how to hu2 without any tai2…

“Just peng peng hu la.”
[Huh? But I’m new here.]

1st solo win. Simple cards. Posted by Hello

Da jie's big win... nan2 feng1... she was nan2... she had rooster and centipede... she zi4 mo1 the last card. Everyone walked away w/o paying her. Posted by Hello

(Andy’s house on 3rd day of CNY)
The mj session with pri sch mates actually materialized. I learnt a lot more there without paying “school fees”. Won some games, lost some games and won 20cents in the end.

Bamboo win... was it limit? It was dong1 feng1 and I zi4 mo1 right? Or did Jianfang throw that card? I don't know, I juz knew I was very happy as I collected my chips. Posted by Hello

Sleepy win. Posted by Hello

Jianfang Posted by Hello

Jiaqing Posted by Hello

Andy the Ah Gong. Posted by Hello

Me Posted by Hello

Surprisingly, Andy is a good host… Oops… did I say surprisingly? Haha… for one thing, I never knew Ah Gong Andy would shell prawns for us. His mum is very friendly too. She makes sure her guests are comfortable and she makes really good food. I ate 2 layers of pineapple tarts in the container and a considerable amount of keropok. This time the poison method did not work. I’ll touch on that later.

We played from 5pm and by midnight I was getting sicker and sicker but we carried on till 3am. And I had work the next day.

Happy smiles.... erm except Jiaqing... Posted by Hello

Tired faces... Jiaqing spoilt it again. Posted by Hello

(Back to work)
So I went to work the next day (Saturday) with not much voice left. Work was ok. Managed to pull myself through till the end of the day. And my last class on Saturday (my fave class with that baby calling me a tortoise) had 3 mummies giving me ang pows. One of the mummies told me “All the mummies and babies like you.” As she handed me the ang pow. That really touched me.

And then that night I lost my voice. No voice came out at all. I talk in whispers. I think I’ve spoilt my vocal chords. I won’t be able to sing anymore… BOO HOO!!!! Not like I can sing very well.

So on Sunday I taught without much voice. I was REALLY grateful to 2 of my colleagues, Janet and Huishan for sitting in with me for 2 of my classes. Janet practically did a one-man-show and Huishan helped me with the 2nd half of the lesson when she herself is a little sick as well. Really appreciate their kindness. They sacrificed their breaks just to sit in with me. *BIG BEAR HUGZ*

And while everyone pitied poor Jolene on the outside for losing her voice (and laughed at me on the inside thinking how I deserve it), Lavinia openly laughed at me. She just can’t stop laughing each time she sees me and I finally demanded to know why. She said that was the first time she saw me speaking so gently, which was so unlike me and suggested I should speak more gently more often. As if knowing I had no voice to retaliate, she walked away before I could “whisper” any retort.

Got more ang pows from parents again. They are so kind!!! Although we are not allowed to keep them for ourselves, it feels good to know that parents actually have teachers in their hearts.

I haven’t seen a lot of my relatives this cny as I wasn’t able to go visiting during the weekends. Cny seem ok… not as loathsome as I thought it would be. I just wish to recover really soon. It’s been 2 weeks and it has been dreadful. I will finally go see a doctor tomorrow, I promise.


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