Be strong, Simba

The blood test result is out. Simba is diagnosed with kidney failure. She’s hospitalized at the vet now. The last time I saw her was in the morning before I went to work. I miss her so much… The thought of her all alone at the vet now really breaks my heart. The vet said that if she manages to pull through these 2 days, she would have to undergo weekly “dialysis” for the rest of her life.

She may be just a cat; however she is certainly not just a cat to us. She has human-like qualities in her. Those who have seen her will definitely attest to that. She has brought great joy to us and is a part of our family. People who are not animal lovers or pet owners will never understand the pain we are going through now.

To all my friends whom I sms earlier in the afternoon, thank you from the bottom of my heart for keeping her in prayers. To all reading this, please help me pray for her.

Thank you.

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Since a week ago, baba hasn’t really been her usual playful self. She doesn’t run to the door to greet us. She doesn’t trot to us when we call for her. She doesn’t play catching with us. She doesn’t chase little insects and lizards. She doesn’t jump up to sleep on her favourite chair or on the window ledge. She doesn’t jump up to the basin to urinate anymore but does it on the bathroom floor and rags. She must had been too weak to jump. She has stopped putting her paws on top of the food container whenever she wants food. She simply doesn’t eat now. She doesn’t drink water when she used to lap up a lot in the past. She kept vomiting and shitting watery stools when she did not even eat or drink.

She has been sporting spikey fur too. Sick animals usual have fur or feathers that stand up. Silly me still made fun of her and called her “hyena” coz on top of her spikey fur, the way she hunched and crouched really made her look like a hyena. When my da jie suspected her of contracting “lao mao chi dai zhen”. I merely brushed it away.

For the past two days, her body has been cold and limp. She has been very nua—almost like a dead cat with minimal movement. It was a lot worse than when she had fever a few years ago and mites a few months back. It got all of us worried. We had never seen her in such a state before.

She had also been hiding a lot too and not in all her usually haunts. Even though she was in the house, we could never find where she was unless she decided to creep out silently from her hiding place herself. When cats know they are dying, they tend to hide as they do not want anyone to see them go.

My parents and er jie sent her to the vet on Sunday. She was sooooo frightened yet so guai. Even though she struggled, she didn’t behave like an angry mad cat like how most cats behave when brought to the vet. The vet suspected her of having kidney or liver failure and gave her two jabs.

FAILURE, not disease. He said that a blood test was needed to confirm it and we had to brace ourselves for the best.

When the vet drew blood from her, nobody was allowed in the room. From outside the room, they could hear her crying. Even though I wasn’t there physically, I felt like crying when they told me this.

At home, we had to give her four different types of medicine. I feel so 心痛 xin tong for her whenever we force feed her medicine. The holding down, the forcing open of mouth, the look of her agonised face and the sounds of her cries pain us deeply.

After the medicine torture, she walked away from where we squatted. From that level and angle, I saw her 背影, limping away I supposed due to the drawing of blood from her leg.

However what pains me the most was the thoughtfulness baba exhibited on Sunday night even when she was so sick and weak. She retched loudly and vomited at the recess area and was crouching there for quite some time. After a while, she limped all the way to the toilet, sat on the floor and urinated. Amidst her frailty, she could still painstakingly limp to the toilet to urinate instead of dirtying the recess area.

I can’t even find the words to describe how I’m feeling now.

I feel like taking leave and just spend all my time with her at the vet.

Simba, hope you are not crying in the hospital now. Be strong. All of us at home miss you.