Friday, September 14, 2007

Not stressed... Just Overworked and Exhausted

I

NEED

A

BREAK

A

SHORT

GETAWAY

ANYTHING

JUST

AWAY

FROM

ALL

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I think I'm doing a lot more than I'm supposed to. I dislike it when people think I'm capable when I'm not even as competent. I'm afraid of not living up to expectations should I not be able to handle all these.

I’ve to come up with a rough plan, a scheme of work for a whole new course by next week. It was stated 3 weeks ago but I simply had no time for it coz I still have to handle my English and Kindergarten curriculum. Yes the extra help was useful. But WE need more help. Help is on the way, help is on the way… Till now also haven’t come.

I’m actually feeling very tired…

Tired of positive thinking all the time. It’s mentally exhausting.

I’m always feeling sleepy and lethargic yet when it’s time to sleep, I’m unable to sleep. Even if I feel drained, I would lie down and not be able to sleep.

I used to work like it’s not work and was very happy. I still do that now but only because I cannot even differentiate what’s work and what’s not; when’s work and when’s not. Work at work. Work at home. No demarcation. When I’m relaxing and surfing online, I’m also doing work at the same time. When I’m watching tv, I’m also doing work at the same time. I can’t stand sitting down to eat in the kitchen coz I find it an absolute waste of time. The only time I really sit down to enjoy a meal is my Saturday night’s out with kh. That’s the only time I feel totally relaxed.

I used to enjoy working. Then, to be able to tolerate. In many aspects it’s a lot more tolerable than my prev co. However, when my passion for teaching is slowly dissipating, maybe I should reconsider other options. There was a time when I actually felt that teaching was not my cup of tea. I went home to cry… First time I cried because of students. They were so unfeeling when I was so sick. I kept spoiling my voice with the constant teaching. I can’t even talk w/o clearing my throat now. I haven’t tried singing yet. I suppose I’ve totally ruined my voice.

I will hold on… persevere… I’ve still got a lot of responsibilities. It’s no good to leave shit for people to clear. I’m ranting… Maybe I will wake up to a bright and cheery day and I’ll look back on this post and scoff at myself.

Look at the time now. I’ve to wake up at 7+ later as I’ll be hitching a ride from my dad. It’s supposed to be my afternoon-in later but I’ve still got so much to clear.

I’ll reply to tags and comments another day ya? Apologies!! =)

In the meantime, enjoy this inspirational story… received it over email from flor. Thanx babe!


The Mayonnaise Jar & 2 Cups of Coffee

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar... and it's story...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an emphatic "yes." The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things. Your family, your children,your faith, your health, your friends, and your favourite passions. Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter. Your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

~end~


How apt… I should learn to think more for myself. Focus on my golf balls.

I’m glad to be meeting up for more than just coffee with 2 different groups of lovely people soon. There's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a couple of friends.

=)

6 comments:

  1. Hello dear,

    That is s nice story. Please take care of yourself. Don't overwork. I think you should go for a holiday. And you have such pretty jackets. Make use of them for your holiday ok.

    Yen

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wah liew...

    Bu hui gan dong !! reading ur story made me tear le...wah liew..ok is that the reason why we have time to meet tomorrow for a cup of tea and coffee? hee hee

    thanks for the blog. i too feel its not my cup of tea will share more with u tomorrow. i have grown immune to vulgarities and verbal abuse. If i am a tad more hooligan i would have gotten a few hooligans and beat the hell outta them. wee wee.

    i am glad it is friday. really am glad. see ya tomorrow. take care!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. hey babe, do you want to buy a small portable microphone? i realise it does help in conserving energy, esp if you have to talk for many hrs at a go.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Great story. There is the australian version in which you have a few pints of beer instead of coffee. I love my beer.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hello dearest Jolene!!! :D

    How are u feeling by now???

    Let me share with u a meaningful portion of a blog entry
    written by my very favourite Tay Ping Hui aka 郑斌辉:

    "人生现实告诉我。
    当我们死后,公司会在最短时间内,
    找到一个替代我们的人。

    朋友会回到他们自己拥有的生活。

    爱人也可能经过时间的冲淡,
    找到另外的春天。

    大家都会忘记我们的存在,

    只是时间长短问题。
    但我们家人,会永远为我们悲凄。"

    So remember tat if your health will to suffer~
    It's your closest kins who will be there unconditionally for us~
    They are the ones who will feel hurt,
    worried and sad for us in life~

    NOT the company!!! :P

    I know it's easy for me to say so~
    But hope tat while u are working hard,
    u know how to balance your life and play even harder too!!!

    All these cannot go on forever~

    Take a break and go for a short
    trip to re-charge yrself and
    think about wat u really want in life when needed!!!

    Take good care always!!!
    And don't push yrself to hard~
    Don't get any thinner hor? *keke*!!!

    Take care always!!!
    And sincerely hope everything will be 'sorten out' and u will feel better~
    And know how to handle and wat to do v soon!!!

    Hang in there! God Bless u!!! :D :D :D

    Lotsa LoVe, VIVIEN!!! :D

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yen,
    I wish to go. I wish to go. Wah make use of jackets for holiday means must go colder countries, means further, means more ex, means more days of leave. I can’t afford.


    tiffy,
    Huh why gan dong? Which part made you tear? Oh I’ve uploaded the photos on multiply liao. Will blog about that night soon.


    yizhen,
    Thanx for your suggestion but cannot cannot… The surrounding classroom people can already hear my voice loud and clear, if I use a mic I would give no peace to them.

    anon,
    You must be a beer-guzzling Australian. =)

    Vivien,
    Wow… Thanx for sharing. It’s really meaningful. After reading that, you know what I feel like doing? I feel like handing in my resignation letter and see how fast they can hire somebody in my place. Wahaha… my boss just told me he qing3 bu2 dao4 ren to help me out with my new "project" lor. I want to play harder too leh. I wanna go on holiday too leh. But I really cannot find the time and opportunity. And I hope I’m not growing thinner coz I’m eating a lot more after I’ve recovered. Things will definitely be sorted in a matter of time. Just have to go through this grueling process.

    I will survive! ;P

    ReplyDelete

I love reading sincere comments and hearing your voice. While blatant self promotion of blogs and follow for follow requests are not advisable, I would love if you leave a mark here with a trackback link so that I could connect with you. I reply to comments here or on your blog so don't forget to check back on replies! =)

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